THE DAY I DIED

 Hello lovely king and quins,

If you read an article I wrote recently, I expressed the mental state I found myself in during a period of my life. You may ask "aren't you a pastor's child? while I could say 'so', I'd like to focus on what matters and that is we are all first children of God before any other titles, we are people trying to understand and figure out what we have with Jesus. This is a continuation of my blog post titled “Broken", I'd prefer to call it BROKEN(not empty) but this is an answer to the question; How did you get out of it all? The moment I realized I could get out of it all on my own and had resolved to make my relationship with God work, I set aside everything I had heard & seen about him and decided to genuinely work with him. Of course, there was a bias, I was in it for me! I mean who wants to go through all that and gain nothing?

The first thing I found was this incredible strength and desire to understand this person or being I did not know at the time, which was pretty odd because, before church, my bible and everything on that axis were pretty boring. But this time I was looking for upbeat gospel music, downloading messages, and sticking to a rigid routine. If I missed my 1hour prayer, I'd feel so bad and wait till the next time to get it right. I made sure to follow everything by the standards I had set. Now, this was where the challenge came. After 3 months I started struggling to keep up with my midnight prayers, 4 bible groups, prayer meetings, and 2-hour studies. The issue wasn't exactly with the routine but rather the structure. You see I believed that with all that I would never be in that bad space again and I'd never have a dry spell but there I was having a dry spell (an inconsistent devotion and a bad feeling that started draining my energy for devotion). One day in church, my pastor read two scriptures and all through service till the end, my mind was in a loop on the two of them;

I have been crucified with Christ [that is, in Him, I have shared His crucifixion]; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body I live by faith [by adhering to, relying on, and completely trusting] in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me...Galatians 2:20(Amplified bible)

         This scripture solved 99.9% of my situation and gave me this peace and newfound strength. I don't need to fight from the point of someone trying to win, I already won! I am dead to sin and not in me but in Jesus. When he died I died, when he defeated Satan, I did and When he rose I did Wow!!! So I am now aware that Christ lives in me, he runs the show and all I have to do is give him the wheel. when you try devotion from the point of a chore rather than a relationship, you'll never get it right.

When you are committed to someone in a relationship and you forget to call the person and speak with the person, do you say "Oh no! I'll wait till tomorrow morning, then I’ll do it right". No, you pick up your phone and reach out to the person immediately that's how it works. This doesn't mean you don't discipline yourself to make sure that relationship keeps blooming, rather it means that the moment you haven’t done well, you fix it, you are in a relationship with your maker, he is your father, friend, and your lover. If we see God from this point, I mean not just say but relate this concept to ourselves, our relationship with him will be wonderful. There are sometimes you wake up and don't feel like speaking to your partner or they offend you and you don't understand why. What do you do? You work it out, against how you feel, and you are determined to make it work. That's how to stay with Abba.

"For the love of The Messiah compels us to reason this: The One died in the place of every person; so then every person died with him”.2 Corinthian 5:14(Aramaic Bible in plain English)

Another scripture that unleashed a crazy amount of crazy faith in me is 2 Corinthians 5:14. You mean the power on which my entire existence rests is "Love", That Jesus came to handle a problem he did not start, he took care of a bill he had no business with and even died for someone who hated his guts. Imagine putting yourself on the line for someone who broke your heart over and over again. That's what Jesus did for us. His death was gruesome; the people he loved hated him, yet he still took their place on the cross to give them a life they did not deserve. This is how God said I love you...most times we say, "if you love me, prove it, show me" Jesus did, he laid his life down for his friend, and not only that he made sure that you seat with him beside God and he said that greater than he did you will do. 

The day I died was the day I asked Jesus into my life. the day I lived I realized that I asked The Jesus Christ of Nazareth into my life, and my life changed forever and this life isn't for a select few it is for all who believe, that includes you too.

Next week Friday will be a super amazing one. I can't wait to share more with you. If you learned something super helpful from this post ♥, please leave a comment or questions. Let's all read again next week by 7pm, I won't be a stranger this year.

 Remember to join the gist on Fridays.

 I love you guys but God loves you more, it's still your girl Quin_ronie promising to keep it real. period!